Daniel Radcliffe made his way to his trailer. They’d been filming all day, and not only was he exhausted…he was deliriously exhausted. He’d been acting weird all day: Pointing and laughing at a microphone, telling nonsensical jokes to Rupert and Emma, who could only nod and smile half heartedly at him while he laughed uproariously, and going over to where Tom was getting his hair done, and ran his fingers through it, cooing at how it looked as if spun sunshine was on his head. When David, the director, got wind of it, he ordered Daniel to go get some rest.

So here he was now, standing in the middle of his trailer, too tired to even go to bed. Instead, he got undressed down to his boxer shorts with ‘Potters Do It Better’ emblazoned across the seat of them (a gag gift from Rupert), and turned on the radio while he went into the shower. It didn’t take him long, so about ten minutes later, he came back out of the bathroom, a towel slung around his hips. A song came on the radio, making him freeze. He listened to the first strains of it, and grinned deliriously. Grabbing up a brush, he started to strut about his trailer, and started to sing.

‘I’m Too Sexy’ by Right Said Fred
**Author’s Note: Of course, for this one, the lyrics will be changed up a bit. Thank you.**

I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love, love’s going to leave me!!

I’m too sexy for my robes, too sexy for my robes,
So sexy it hurts!!
And I’m too sexy for Hogwarts, too sexy for Hogwarts,
Britain and Quidditch!!

And I’m too sexy for The Burrow, too sexy for The Burrow
No way I’m goin’ De-Gnoming!!

I’m a wizard, you know what I mean
And I do my little flick with my wand hand
Yea, with my wand hand, with my wand hand,
I do my little flick with my wand hand!!

I’m too sexy for my scar, too sexy for my scar,
Too sexy by far!!
I’m too sexy for Herm’s cat, too sexy for Herm’s cat,
What d’you think about that?!

I’m a wizard, you know what I mean
I do my little flick with my wand hand
Yea with my wand hand, oh with my wand hand
I shake my little tush as I flick it!!


As Daniel continued to dance and strut about in his trailer, Emma, Rupert, and Tom had decided at that moment to come and see how he was doing. When they got there, they almost keeled over in shock. There was their friend…their usually pretty straight-laced friend, wearing only a towel, dancing and strutting around in his trailer to…’I’m Too Sexy’.


I’m too sexy for my…too sexy for my…too sexy for my…

‘Cause I’m a wizard, you know what I mean
And I do my little flick with my wand hand
Yea with my wand hand, with my wand hand,
I shake my little tush as I flick it!!

I’m too sexy for Herm’s cat, too sexy for Herm’s cat
Poor pussy…Poor pussy cat!!
I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love, love’s going to leave me!!

And I’m too sexy for this song!!


While all this was going on, Emma had taken out her video phone and was filming this, stifling her giggles in her sleeve. Meanwhile, both Tom and Rupert were gaping; Tom in astonishment, and Rupert in abject horror.

“It’s turned him nutters”, Tom breathed incredulously.

“I think it’s pretty funny”, Emma giggled, still filming this with her video phone.

“What the bloody fucking hell are we looking at here??” Rupert croaked.

“He must be more tired than any of us thought”, Tom said.

They went back to watching Daniel, who was now air guitaring to Guns ‘N’ Roses.

“Okay, making fun of a goofy song, I can tolerate, but I will NOT stand about and watch him mangle ‘November Rain’”, Emma said, going to the door and knocking on it. As she waited for Daniel to answer it, she hummed cheerfully as she started to email the little video to every single person on the cast and crew. The door finally opened, and there was Daniel, still wearing the towel.

“Oh, hello, Emma”, he said. He let the three of them in.

“Are you getting your rest?” Emma asked sternly.

“Uh…yes, of course I’m getting my rest”, Danny said.

“That’s not what WE saw, mate”, Rupert said, grimacing.

Danny raised his eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

Without a word, Emma played the little clip she filmed, and showed it to him, making him grimace.

“Now, you better GET YOUR REST!!” Emma said firmly, taking him by his shoulder and pushing him toward his bed. She rolled her eyes when Daniel’s towel fell off. “Oh for God’s sake!!” She bent and grabbed the towel, thrusting it into Daniel’s hand. “Get bloody dressed, you!!”

“Yes, MUM”, Daniel grumbled, slinking off obediently.

“Children”, Emma groaned playfully. “I’m surrounded by children!!”

Both Tom and Rupert started laughing.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

For weeks afterwards, Daniel could not live that clip down no matter how much he tried. Someone even went as far as to print a picture of him in the towel, and put it on a shirt with a caption that read ‘I’m Too Sexy’. If magic were real, he’d have hexed Tom’s bloody balls off.

‘Payback will be mine’, Daniel thought broodingly. ‘Oh yes. Payback WILL be mine.’

To make sure such a humiliating thing never happened again, Daniel slept on every day off.